Regret.

In Servais Pinckaers' meditations on the Beatitudes (see next item down), he writes about the different kinds of poverty we must endure, including what he calls "the poverty of error and sin":

It is painful to endure a sense of guilt, the thought of having been deliberately hard and wicked. It is miserable enough to have made a mistake or committed some piece of folly through weakness or a trick of the subconscious, but if we have intentionally become involved in evil who can relieve us of this horrible reality which clings to us and attacks our most intimate sense of self-esteem?

That came forcefully to mind today when I came across the following from actress Ellen Burstyn, regarding the abortion she had as a young woman:

At the time I was just young and dumb, I didn't really want to have a baby then. It was the wrong thing to do and I didn't really understand that till later. That was very very painful, that was probably the worst....These experiences are—we make a choice, and they have ramifications for the rest of our life...It's one of the dark threads [in our life's tapestry]. I try not to allow regret to settle over me like a shroud, because I think it's an unhealthy way to live."

Via the Corner.